Dear Silver

 

You've never met me, but I once saw you sitting atop a condominium rest house in Venice, looking through the window. If nothing else you better contact me by way of telephone, email or the old-fashioned snail mail. We have things to talk about, such as why colors don't mix the same way as they used to, and why meals always lack some certain ingredient. We will start an investigation of all the things that went wrong this year. We'll walk through the streets and find our way to the alleys out back. If Mr. Valedomo's precious ivory vase doesn't get found, we don't know if he would suffer another stroke. We must also find a stock of green bell peppers for Mrs. St. Bell.

Early Summer

Of all the things that could've happened, I chose to meet you in the backend of a flea market. I wish for things. I'll be running around town trying to get myself cheap things - like cheapo flashlights, christmas lights, an extra lightbulb, batteries, just to go with my thrift books and some secondhand bookshelves I bought for my house. Life changes. Life passes by. And no one can predict what can happen at all. All we have is our sanity, and our self-will to survive. All we have are plans. Plans for the next 300 days, plans to work, plans to meet people and make something good happen in our lives.

We don't mind if someone tries to sip from our Boba cups without asking for our permission - we go ahead and buy new Boba cups. I also wish I had a new cup for tea - I also wish I had money for tea. All the things we've been through these past years, they've helped to form our character. All the pain and grovelling in the dark has built in us a newfound appreciation of the world. And more motivation to continue.

For the next few months, we will get our homework done. We will plant seeds and sow them later. Today is the beginning of our careers. So we must start early and make good use of our time. Learn how to man the boat. Learn for a lifetime, and make money for a lifetime as a result.

What is the greatest mistake you’ve ever made?

I think the thing that has really caused me the greatest guilt was not choosing Fine Arts as my college course.

It was so complicated. It looked like I had no other option from the offset (the beginning of college), but to choose a course in which I actually could get a job. My dream would be fulfilled if I took Fine Arts, if not only for a talent test by which I would be rejected or admitted to the college.

I fought with myself a lot about whether choosing Linguistics was right or wrong, because I kind of felt it was boring. However, if ¨boring¨ actually meant real parties, outings, clubs, lifelong friends and a sense of purpose, I think it really just meant I was preparing for the real world and a job.

Anyway, Iḿ really grateful for my professors who were unusually forgiving, kind and supportive. If the world isn´t that good of a place, I found people that truly cared.

I miss my friends Jinko, Babylyn, Dianne, Marichelle and others. I´ll really miss Ma´am Ria, Bae-Seonsaengnim, Ma´am Flori and Sir Nolasco. They were great people and true inspirations.

I think that as my time in college ended, and my friends and I are finally off to chasing our dreams on our own as young twentysomethings, I think it really wasn´t the worst mistake to choose the ¨wrong¨ college course.

You just spent all day by yourself. Are you bored?

 Iĺl be sort of bored, but for the most part, I think not. I would really have fun being by myself. I guess I lack time for reflection these days, right now being worried about the state of affairs of the world.

I think itś really not that easy to get bored in a world with too much trouble. With markets crashing, poverty and hunger being abundant all over the globe, and crime waves going on everywhere, one should have much to do. In fact, you could get too tired and stressed with the amount of work there is in store for humanity because of all the people who don´t show up (people really show up when itś for school or work, but as friends during troubled times, how often have you seen someone who has been there to fully support you?). A lot of people actually tell those people in the hot seat that they simply ¨lack the time¨.

Admittedly, I know that many people spend more time by themselves these days. Due to a shortage of instructions in the use of the modern worldś technology, human isolation grows. Depression disorders are not that uncommon at all.

Come to think of it, as boredom is really a problem elsewhere around me, it might be that era in the world where humankind has to answer the crucial question of what to do with his own personal time. I truly purport that todayś world has a lot of electronic gadgets, but there are really not enough new inventions. Clothes do change every 10 years or even every 2 months (nowadays), but not to be too keen on the nitty-gritty: clothes these days don´t look fantastic enough. Most people do lack the personal decoration.

Compared to the fashion of the Elizabethan or Victorian era, modern men and women really look like they wear clothes for work all the time, rather than flaunt their own personality. I could be mistaken, but it seems to be an early time for the post-2000s world.

Musings on a Cold Night

Dec-20-2020 | 7 : 42 PM

Have you ever felt sometimes that it was hard to feel? Have you ever felt joyful in your heart, yet humanly alone?

I think vacations can get too drafty sometimes, as even the best minds feel isolated in this present dark landscape.

Yesterday was my birthday. Two days from now is just the eve of Christmas. Letś see: I´ve finally gotten a laptop and I´ve gotten a cute hand-warmer pillow as a birthday gift - some clues I hope to figuring out how to make my own cash. I dearly love my sister, Ate Ada, since sheś been teaching me how to be brave and always do absolutely anything you want - that itś the ultimate gift in Christ. Kind of fantastic and over-the-top, but itś true. This dark comedy of modern manners is kind of getting to me. Why are we over-the-top or nothing at all? I think this society creates bipolar disorder for real.

By the way, I´ve noticed that the world has left out some serious advocacy for bipolar disorder, depression and suicidal thoughts. Is it really too heavy for man? Or has the government been keeping silent the whole time? When have you ever seen people going off the deep end without anyone saying a word?

What is the situation? I think some timely books that make up the titles for our era are: 1Q84 by Haruki Murakami, Freakonomics by Dubner and Levitt, and Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert. Itś a weird crime-laden world where the markets have crashed repeatedly, and hey, are we still fooling some Philistines out there that we don know what weŕe doing at all? Some young kids really don´t know what they´re doing but theyŕe parents are really worried if they would really come near to God of their own accord.

We really need to make our move. But are we ready? Thatś the question.

I think we should all post about ourselves and our lives and leave the government information and evidence to work on.

What’s your first memory?

 My mind isn't very clear on this one memory that I call my "first memory"...It was my memory of my first word. I was just one year old and both my parents were pushing me in a pram around a corner, and a bird landed on my pram and I became very interested, announcing my first English word, "Bird!" My parents acted really proud.

I also have this one distant memory of my sister going to therapy classes (as she was having some speech delay) where I had to wait outside the school and wondered what in the world, was a huge inflatable swimming pool shaped like a dinosaur doing there. It was really strange, a great big teal dinosaur sitting there, standing as some sort of omen or sign I couldn't understand.